an online book by David Gurteen
video player Harvard Commencement speech 2013 | Oprah Winfrey Transcript This is a transcript of where she talks about the importance of having face-to-face conversations with people whom you may disagree. Posts where this video is embedded Admit When We Are Wrong ** We find it difficult to admit when we are wrong Changing Minds Through Conversation … Continue reading Harvard Commencement Speech Oprah Winfrey (2013)
And even though this is the college where Facebook was born, my hope is that you would try to go out and have more face-to-face conversations with people you may disagree with. That you’ll have the courage to look them in the eye and hear their point of view. And help make sure that the … Continue reading Have More Conversations with People Whom You Disagree Oprah Winfrey
In this book, Conflicted, Ian Leslie draws essential lessons on how to disagree well from world-class experts: interrogators, hostage negotiators, divorce mediators, diplomats, and addiction counselors. It tells inspiring stories of productive disagreements, from the invention of the airplane to the success of The Rolling Stones, and combines them with fascinating insights from the science … Continue reading Conflicted: Why Arguments Are Tearing Us Apart and How They Can Bring Us Together by Ian Leslie (2021)
We don’t have a good word for engaging in a non-hostile disagreement with the shared aim of moving the participants towards a new understanding, better decision or new idea. Debate implies a competition with winners and losers. Argument comes tinged with animosity. Dialogue is too bland. Dialectic is too obscure. We talk about argument as … Continue reading We Don’t Have a Good Word for Engaging in a Non-hostile Disagreement Ian Leslie
Imagine a culture where an argument is viewed as a dance, the participants are seen as performers, and the goal is to perform in a balanced and aesthetically pleasing way. In such a culture, people would view arguments differently, experience them differently, carry them out differently, and talk about them differently. But we would probably … Continue reading Imagine a Culture Where an Argument Is Viewed as a Dance George Lakoff and Mark Johnsen
Productive disagreement depends on how people feel about each other. We spend a lot of time thinking about how to argue, and not enough on how to shape the relationship that will define how the engagement goes. It’s often said that in order to disagree well, people need to put emotions aside and think purely … Continue reading Productive Disagreement Depends on How People Feel About Each Other Ian Leslie
How to disagree productively and find common ground | Julia Dhar Posts where this video is embedded Admit When We Are Wrong ** We find it difficult to admit when we are wrong Changing Minds Through Conversation The role of conversation in Derek Black’s transformation Chatbots to Analyze Conversations and Presentations Analysis of transcripts Construct Steel Positions Not Straw … Continue reading How to Disagree Productively and Find Common Ground Julia Dhar
Disagreeability needs to make a roaring comeback. Credit: Eric Weinstein Posts where this quotation is embedded Admit When We Are Wrong ** We find it difficult to admit when we are wrong Changing Minds Through Conversation The role of conversation in Derek Black’s transformation Chatbots to Analyze Conversations and Presentations Analysis of transcripts Construct Steel Positions Not Straw Ones … Continue reading Disagreeability Needs to Make a Roaring Comeback Eric Weinstein
Speak with Less Conviction Reduce Emailing and Texting ** Close Pop-up all posts in this chapter Disagree constructively: Disagreement is an inevitable part of life. Most of the time, we do it poorly. We need to learn to disagree constructively. How do we go about it? A simple disagreement hierarchy provides guidance. Disagreement is an … Continue reading Disagree Constructively How to disagree well
Reduce Emailing and Texting ** Tell the Truth Close Pop-up all posts in this chapter Show respect: We often show disrespect for people with whom we disagree. This is damaging to the relationship and society. However, we do not need to respect someone or their ideas to show them respect. The Problem When people disagree … Continue reading Show Respect Failing to respect one another negatively impacts the future for all of us
Randomised Coffee Trials Speed Consulting Close Pop-up all posts in this chapter Ritual Dissent is a structured way for a group of peers to criticize proposals or ideas by subjecting them to ritualized dissent in order to improve them. Resources Ritual Dissent Cynefin: Ritual Dissent Blog Post: Ritual Dissent, Facilitation that Goes Beyond Comfortable Consensus by … Continue reading Ritual Dissent ** A structured way for a group of peers to criticize proposals or ideas
