Chapter: The Power of Conversation


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Conversation is the way that humans have always thought together. In conversation we discover shared meaning. It is the primal human organizing tool.

Even in the corridors of power, very little real action happens in debate, but rather in the side rooms, the hallways, the lunches, the times away from the ritual spaces of authority and in the relaxed spaces of being human.

In all of our design of meetings, engagement, planning or whatever, if you aren't building conversation into the process, you will not benefit from the collective power and wisdom of humans thinking together.

These are not 'soft' processes. This is how wars get started and how wars end. It's how money is made, lives started, freedom realized. It is the core human organizing competency.

Credit: Meg Wheatley


In this chapter, I explore the power of conversation. The chapter consists of an electric mix of insights into the nature and power of conversation.


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Introduction: the Power of Conversation A powerful, adaptable human technology

What Is the Difference Between Rhetoric and Oracy? What Is a Real Conversation? What’s the Vibe? Please be patient as this may take up to a minute to load… Close Conversation is a form of interactive, spontaneous communication between two or more people. Typically it occurs in spoken communication, as written exchanges are usually not Continue reading Introduction: the Power of Conversation A powerful, adaptable human technology

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What Is a Real Conversation? There is more to conversation than just talking or exchanging messages

Conversation is one of the most familiar human activities, yet we rarely stop to ask what it really is. Many different kinds of exchange are described as conversations, even when something important is missing. A real conversation is defined by qualities that make it uniquely human and deeply meaningful. Continue reading What Is a Real Conversation? There is more to conversation than just talking or exchanging messages

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Levels of Conversation ** Four levels of conversation

Conversational Capacities From Conversation to Conversing What’s the Vibe? Please be patient as this may take up to a minute to load… Close Introduction Conversations can be categorized according to level in many ways, depending on the purpose of the categorization. For example, how different styles of conversation can help nurture stronger relationships. Sense-making levels Continue reading Levels of Conversation ** Four levels of conversation

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The Power of Random Conversations Creating the conditions for knowledge to spread through conversation

Organizations invest heavily in formal knowledge-sharing methods. Yet many of the most valuable insights are spread through informal conversation. By creating the conditions for people to meet, talk, and exchange ideas, we increase the chances that knowledge finds the person who needs it, when they need it. Continue reading The Power of Random Conversations Creating the conditions for knowledge to spread through conversation

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Conversation Is a Dance ** Conversation and dance are both improvisational

The phrase “conversation is a dance” highlights how conversation is an improvisational, collaborative, and responsive process, similar to dancing, where participants move together in sync, sensing each other’s rhythms and adapting to create a fluid and shared experience rather than a rigid performance. This “dance” emphasizes a mutual exchange of ideas, trust, and understanding, requiring … Continue reading Conversation Is a Dance ** Conversation and dance are both improvisational

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Life Is a Conversation ** Life is a conversation between ourselves and the world around us

Improving Informal Conversations ** Conversation Is More Than Communication What’s the Vibe? Please be patient as this may take up to a minute to load… Close Life is a conversation between ourselves and the world around us. What conversation do you want your life to be? Continue reading Life Is a Conversation ** Life is a conversation between ourselves and the world around us

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Conversation Is More Than Communication Conversation shapes our lives

Life Is a Conversation ** The Difference Between Dialogue and Debate ** What’s the Vibe? Please be patient as this may take up to a minute to load… Close Face-to-face conversation is far more than just communication. When we have a conversation, we don’t just exchange information. That’s what computers do. It’s not what people Continue reading Conversation Is More Than Communication Conversation shapes our lives

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The Jazz of Conversations Drawing parallels between jazz improv and conversations

The Difference Between Dialogue and Debate ** Meetings and Conversations Serve Two Purposes What’s the Vibe? Please be patient as this may take up to a minute to load… Close With increasing polarization in society, effective communication that fosters connection and understanding is essential. Jazz improvisation and conversation share several key similarities, including spontaneity, collaboration, Continue reading The Jazz of Conversations Drawing parallels between jazz improv and conversations

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Why Face-to-face Interaction Matters ** Our social life is essential to our wellbeing and health

Meetings and Conversations Serve Two Purposes Friends with Cognitive Benefits What’s the Vibe? Please be patient as this may take up to a minute to load… Close The Italian island of Sardinia has more than six times as many centenarians as the mainland and ten times as many as North America. Why? According to longevity Continue reading Why Face-to-face Interaction Matters ** Our social life is essential to our wellbeing and health

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Friends with Cognitive Benefits Engaging in short friendly conversations improves people's thinking

Why Face-to-face Interaction Matters ** Verbal Judo ** What’s the Vibe? Please be patient as this may take up to a minute to load… Close Research shows that engaging in short friendly conversations boosts people’s performance on a variety of cognitive tasks. A study in 2011 by researchers at the University of Michigan tested 192 Continue reading Friends with Cognitive Benefits Engaging in short friendly conversations improves people’s thinking

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Verbal Judo ** Using one's words to prevent, de-escalate, or end an attempted assault.

Friends with Cognitive Benefits Cognitive Diversity What’s the Vibe? Please be patient as this may take up to a minute to load… Close Verbal self-defense, also known as verbal judo,is defined as using one’s words to prevent, de-escalate, or end an attempted assault. It is a way of using words as a way to maintain Continue reading Verbal Judo ** Using one’s words to prevent, de-escalate, or end an attempted assault.

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Cognitive Diversity Seeing and processing the world differently

Verbal Judo ** Turn-taking in Conversation What’s the Vibe? Please be patient as this may take up to a minute to load… Close When thinking about organizations or teams, we most commonly think about diversity in terms of gender, race, or age. But there is another form of diversity that is often overlooked – cognitive Continue reading Cognitive Diversity Seeing and processing the world differently

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The Myth of Thamus and Theuth Does writing allow the pretense of understanding, rather than true understanding?

In Plato’s Phaedrus, Socrates shares the myth of Thamus and Theuth, questioning the invention of writing. Writing, he argues, weakens memory and offers the appearance of wisdom without true understanding. Socrates suggests that serious discourse using the dialectic method is a nobler pursuit, leading to genuine wisdom and happiness. Continue reading The Myth of Thamus and Theuth Does writing allow the pretense of understanding, rather than true understanding?

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Hard Conversation Conversation is anything but soft and wooly

Thinking Together Let’s Have More Interesting Conversations What’s the Vibe? Please be patient as this may take up to a minute to load… Close Conversation in business is frequently seen as soft and wooly. Is it? I’m afraid the senior managers in my organisation have got no interest in conversation. They see it as far Continue reading Hard Conversation Conversation is anything but soft and wooly

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Let’s Have More Interesting Conversations It's our job

Hard Conversation Conversation Sharpens the Saw What’s the Vibe? Please be patient as this may take up to a minute to load… Close Who gets to decide what makes a useful conversation. You or your manager?  In the book The ClueTrain Manifesto, David Weinberger says: It’s always struck me that David didn’t say productive conversations Continue reading Let’s Have More Interesting Conversations It’s our job

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Organizational Conversation ** The conversation is the organization

Conversation Sharpens the Saw Bake Conversation Into All That We Do ** What’s the Vibe? Please be patient as this may take up to a minute to load… Close Conversation permeates our organizational lives. Organizational Conversation is the myriad of conversations that occur minute-to-minute every day within an organization. Conversations take place in formal settings Continue reading Organizational Conversation ** The conversation is the organization

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Bake Conversation Into All That We Do ** There are so many ways to leverage conversation

Organizational Conversation ** When Laughter Speaks Louder What’s the Vibe? Please be patient as this may take up to a minute to load… Close Conversation is an extraordinary, powerful and adaptable tool that we can put to all manner of purposes. We can bake it into almost everything that we do. We can use conversation Continue reading Bake Conversation Into All That We Do ** There are so many ways to leverage conversation

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When Laughter Speaks Louder How humor and language expose our inner selves

Bake Conversation Into All That We Do ** Conversation Is Not a Panacea for All Our Problems ** What’s the Vibe? Please be patient as this may take up to a minute to load… Close Conversations reveal more than we realize. While we can edit our words in writing, spoken interactions often expose hidden thoughts Continue reading When Laughter Speaks Louder How humor and language expose our inner selves

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Conversation Is Not a Panacea for All Our Problems ** But it goes a long way

When Laughter Speaks Louder Become a Conversation Architect What’s the Vibe? Please be patient as this may take up to a minute to load… Close I often get criticized when I talk about the power of conversation. People conclude that I think conversation will solve all our problems, and nothing else is needed. Or that Continue reading Conversation Is Not a Panacea for All Our Problems ** But it goes a long way

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Become a Conversation Architect A conversation architect designs and convenes conversations

Conversation Is Not a Panacea for All Our Problems ** Oracy What’s the Vibe? Please be patient as this may take up to a minute to load… Close Conversations occur spontaneously in various contexts with little or no thought about who should be involved or how they should be convened or managed. Spontaneous conversations are Continue reading Become a Conversation Architect A conversation architect designs and convenes conversations