I love Anthony de Mello’s perspective on human nature when he says that if someone lets us down, we should not blame them for being untrustworthy but blame ourselves for our bad judgment.
Here is what he says in his book Awareness:
A young man came to complain that his girlfriend had let him down, that she had played false. What are you complaining about? Did you expect any better?
Expect the worst, you're dealing with selfish people. You're the idiot - you glorified her, didn't you? You thought she was a princess, you thought people were nice.
They're not! They're not nice. They're as bad as you are - bad, you understand? They're asleep like you. And what do you think they are going to seek? Their own self-interest, exactly like you. No difference.
Can you imagine how liberating it is that you'll never be disillusioned again, never be disappointed again? You'll never feel let down again. Never feel rejected.
Want to wake up? You want happiness? You want freedom?
Here it is: Drop your false ideas. See through people. If you see through yourself, you will see through everyone. Then you will love them.
Otherwise you spend the whole time grappling with your wrong notions of them, with your illusions that are constantly crashing against reality.
You may initially disagree but reflect on it a little.
Knowledge Letter: Issue: 252 (Subscribe)
Tags: Anthony de Mello (19) | blame (2) | judgement (5) | trust (38)
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Photo Credits: Midjourney (Public Domain)