Converse in Good Faith Be sincere, fair, open, and honest, regardless of the outcome

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Converse in good faith: Converse with the intent to be sincere, fair, open, and honest, regardless of the outcome of the interaction. 

Converse in good faith

In human interactions, good faith is the intent to be sincere, to be fair, open, and honest, regardless of the outcome of the interaction.

Credit: Wikipedia

Assume good faith

We should not only talk in good faith but always assume that others are talking in good faith until proven otherwise. Most people are honest in their beliefs and interactions and genuinely believe they are the good guy.

A real conversation is always in good faith. If either person is lying or deceitful or has a hidden agenda, then the exchange is not in good faith and is not a conversation.

How do we determine if someone is speaking in good faith? We can’t — it’s a judgment call. But we shouldn’t be too quick to judge. Often people are in the grips of tribal thinking  (including ourselves) and are not consciously acting in bad faith.

How to respond to bad faith

How should we respond if we feel the person we are conversing with is not acting in good faith?

• • We can call them on it. If we know the person well and they usually talk in good faith, they may respond positively. On the other hand, they may deny it.
  • We can walk away. This may be the best response in many situations, especially if the relationship is not important to us.
  • We can carry on the conversation as if nothing has happened. But now, we can be on your guard for further deceit and disingenuity. In our heightened sense of observation, we learn more about their character. This response may be a good one if we wish or need to keep the relationship though we are probably no longer talking in good faith ourselves.

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• Converse in good faith. In human interactions, good faith is the intent to be sincere, fair, open, and honest, regardless of the outcome of the interaction.

Resources

• The Consilience Project: The Endgames of Bad Faith Communication

Detailed Resources

• Big Think: Humanity solved the “trust paradox” by going tribal — and paid a horrific price by David R. Samson (2023)
• Blog Post: Human Systems Are Almost Always Based On Trust by Dave Pollard (2023)
• HBR: Rethinking Trust by Roderick M. Kramer (2009)

Posts that link to this post

•  We Can Learn From Anyone There is always some signal
•  Conversation Covenant Creating a psychologically safer space for difficult conversations
•  Rethinking Our Beliefs It is not easy to change our beliefs
•  Levels of Conversation ** Four levels of conversation
•  What Is a Real Conversation? There is more to conversation than just talking or exchanging messages
•  Engaging in Impossible Conversations Impossible conversations are different from difficult conversations

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